Blushblog

31 Days of Service - LIFT

                                             (Image courtesy of www.liftcommunities.org)                                             

Over the last couple of months, media outlets and community representatives have reported the increasing employment gap between white Americans and minority Americans.  The recession has impacted minority communities so much that immediate action is required.  As our government continues to battle over the best way to combat troubling unemployment percentages, grassroots efforts are being forged to assist communities and individuals in need.  For those of us fortunate enough to be employed, it is imperative we join these efforts to ensure our communities are as economically and politically empowered as possible.

In Washington, DC, Lift-DC is a non-profit organization that seeks "to combat poverty and expand opportunity for all people in Washington, DC."  With the assistance of volunteers from local universities and through partnerships with other area organizations and agencies, Lift-DC works one-on-one with its clients to help them attain employment, locate housing, and obtain childcare, healthcare, and legal services. Volunteers also assist clients achieve the computer skills necessary to be competitive for jobs.

Lift-DC is in need of volunteers and monetary contributions to reach and assist as many citizens in need as possible.  Lift-DC's annual benefit event is being held on November 17, 2011 at Long View Gallery. The organization is seeking individual and corporate sponsorships for the benefit. Sponsorships and tickets may be purchased through Raël Nelson-James or online at http://liftdc.eventbrite.com. If you have further questions, please feel free to contract Raël Nelson-James at 202-289-1151 or RNJames@liftcommunities.org.

Lift is also present and active in Boston, Chicago, New York, and Philadelphia.  Please volunteer and/or donate in your area.  A healthy community raises productive citizens.  

Tell us how you are helping your community.

What I Learned and Bought at the Nordstrom Cosmetic Trend Show

I was confident that when I set our departure time at 6:30am and estimated our arrival time at 7:00am we would be the first ladies on the scene to begin a morning of makeup decadence.  I was wrong.  When we arrived at the entrance of Nordstrom at Pentagon City Mall for the celebrated department store's fall Cosmetic Trend Show, we were struck dumb by the line of women who turned to us with triumphant smiles. My sister, who was experiencing the glorious show for the first time, was not prepared for the line of determined women who screamed when the opening gate lifted or the gazelle like speed of these same determined women as they raced for the front row of the red carpet. I must say I was right there with the pack, showing no more restraint than any other.  Once we pleased ourselves with front row seats, with renewed decorum lined up for coffee and danishes.

From the beginning of the show to the end of the show, women screamed and clapped and oooo'd and ahhhh'd at all the new treats the presenting cosmetic lines had to offer.  Chanel, Dior, Smashbox, Estee Lauder, Jo Malone, and so many more kept us on the edge of our seats praying to heaven above for free giveways.  The host informed us that 700 women strong were in attendance for the affair.  As the show ended, we made our way to our makeover appointments and to the makeup artists who hoped to sell us on as much product as possible.

My appointments were with NARS and Dior.  I declined to have a full face from NARS and elected only to sample its blush offerings.  I happily decided on Torrid.  After lunch, I eagerly made my way to my Dior appointment.  I had been craving it all morning.  I mean, I had been drooling over the Dior eyeshadows, the air flash foundation, and beautiful red lipsticks.  Ahhh, hindsight is 100%. I should have a full face done by NARS.  I was so disappointed with how my Dior makeover turned out.  There are a few possibilities for the debacle. Though the foundation felt great, it did not work for me so either the artist was just plain inexperienced or the line does not offer a good color selection for black women.  To make matters worse, the eyeshadow though beautiful was not applied well.  In short, I looked horrible.  I do have complete faith in the eyeshadow (3 Couleurs Smoky Eye Palette in Smoky Black) so I did buy it and will do a better job applying it than the artist.  Unfortunately, my sister had the exact experience at the YSL counter.  Her eyeshadow was beautiful but the foundation match was horrid.

Just when I was concerned that none of the high end brands were catering properly to black women, my coworker displayed her beautifully matched foundation from Chanel.  Chanel just launched more colors with the goal of providing quality product for black consumers.  Her match was phenomenal.  She did not look orange like me nor did she look ashen like my sister.  Dior and YSL, I am calling you out.  Step up your black woman color game!

I will be back in the spring to partake in the festivities again.  Hope to see you there.

Did you attend the show? What did you think?  How was your makeover?  What did you buy?

(Credit for images: Merlisa Lawrence Corbett)

Slim By Summer Challenge Part II

A couple of weeks ago I introduced you to my quest to drop some pounds and get in to shape with the help of Weight Watchers.  As promised, I am back to provide an update on my progress, so here is my two week review. 

I must say that I kinda love Weight Watchers.  The point tracking program forces me to come face to face with what I am putting in my mouth.  Because fruits and vegetables do not factor into your daily point total it is very hard to rationalize having a croissant and yogurt for breakfast instead of an apple and yogurt.  Before Weight Watchers, I felt entitled to my morning croissants.  I mean, I woke up in the morning and got my family ready for the day, and then I blessed the subway and all its commuters with my presence, so the only just reward for my contributions, of course, was a croissant.  Post Weight Watchers, I no longer walk directly to the bakery counter; instead, it is all about the produce aisles.  I have also learned that just because your job caters a free lunch every day does not mean you should eat it, so a spinach salad packed with savory grilled red and green peppers, boiled egg whites, and avocado is the new midday meal.  The problem and point throw away occurs at night after work when I am waiting for dinner to finish cooking and after I put the kids the bed.  As we all know, it is girl scout cookie season, and I am weak or those damn Samoas and  Trefoils.  Needless to say, I have lost valuable points to cookies and croissants.  I try not to be too hard on myself because this is a learning process and I am reversing bad habits that I have caught up to me with age and pregnancy.  However, I am proud to report that I have lost a few inches but have only seen the scale tic down one notch.  Once I get back into my gym workouts, I fully expect better results.

For my third week in the program, I plan to not only get back to the gym but also to check out a Weight Watchers meeting at my local community center.  I will keep you all post.

Here are a few of my point friendly faves so far:

• Whole Foods Geneal Tso's Vegan Chicken

• Fage 2% Greek Yogurt

• Baked Halibut Filet with Green Peppers and Roasted Cauliflower

• Black Beans with Corn Salsa

 

Contraband

I came across this article in the New York Times about a photographer and author named Taryn Simon who has composed a 500-page book called "Contraband."  It's a book that shows over 1,000 items that were seized from people or express mail at John F. Kennedy airport in New York.

Simon set up a makeshift studio at a terminal inside of the airport.  She captured everything from a falcon corpse, to fake Louis Vuitton bags, to boxes of Viagra.  It's crazy the things that people travel with and send through the mail.  This might make an interesting coffee table book.  Take a look at the article.

Here are just a few things that were found.  There are many more on the New York Times website.

 
Animal Fat 

 
Cow Penis


Falcon Corpse

 
Hydrocodone
  
Would you buy this book?
 

Back in the Club

I'm not a club person. I haven't been in a while.  Now that i'm 33, my crowd patience has severely decreased and my crazy guy tolerance is ultra low.  But there are some wonderful sights that bring me great joy.  I can sit back and laugh at the sites for hours.

Here were some of my club observations.  Some good, some bad

• Guys can be so rude.  A guy wouldn't even let me take my coat off before grabbing my hand and wrapping me up.  My coat was down to my elbow, so he's grabbing my hand and the other half of my coat is touching the floor.  Back it up man.  It's not like he even attempted to help me take it off.  He says like 10 words and then asks for my phone number.  It seemed like the high school move where you went in just to see how many numbers you could get.
• There was a girl there in this exact outfit with fishnets and thigh high boots.  I wouldn't have worn it to a club, but she was having a good time, so more power to her.
• I had a guy walk up on me out of the blue and hand me his cell phone.  When I shrugged my shoulders like "what am I suppose to do with this," he said, "Put your number in it."  I handed his phone back to him.  I should've put it in my purse or threw it across the dance floor.  Arrogant ass.  No hello, how ya doin, what's your name.  Nothin.
• Another guy was doing what my friend and I called the "pelvic dance."  He danced with me by trying to push his pelvis against my pelvis.  The top half of him was literally leaning back.  I kept moving backwards and he kept coming at me with his pelvis.  I had to cut that dance short.  Hell, I might be pregnant right now.
• I had another guy try to gyrate on me.  Much like the pelvic dancer.  As I did my two step backwards away from him, he said "you don't like me do you."  I said "why do you say that."  He says "because you keep runnin' from me."  I said "I don't know you."  He said "But if you liked me, you'd be up on me."  Would I now?

• Another guy who'd asked me to dance all night and I'd politely turned him down finally came over at the end of the night and said "I don't even want a dance no more.  I want a date."  Ok, I'm not gonna lie, that line got a chuckle out of me, but I still had no intention of going out with him.

• If I'd turned down a guy to dance and he was in my vicinity, I had to sit perfectly still.  Even if a song that I liked came on, because the guy who just asked me to dance, would be on it.  He'd be in front of me saying "come onnnn let's dance.  Come on.  Come on."  I just wanted to scream NO!!!!  Let me just sit and bob my head.
  

So the question becomes, how can you turn a guy down for a date or a dance without seeming like a stuck-up diva?  I mean, let's be real, you don't want to dance with everyone.  And you certainly don't want to give everyone your number.  Some guys assume that you think that you're "all that" because you said no.  But damn.  You'd have to say yes to everyone.  And i'm sorry, that aint' gonna happen.

On the flip, you could tell the real O.G's because they'd walk up, extend their hand and if you said no, they'd keep it moving and ask the next girl.  I have respect for them.  They aren't spending the next 15 minutes standing in front of you, wiping their sweaty face and head with their shirts, wondering why you don't want to straddle them on the dance floor.  I respect the attempt, but if a girl says no, shake it off.  Keep it moving. 

~Rae

Living with Layoffs, Signs of Depression + My Fantasy Look of the Day

Image: Storm of X-Men from Fan Pop

Life brings adversity.  At some point or points during your days on this earth you will be faced with misfortune, and as misfortune would have it, that tribulation will manifest when you are not prepared for it.

Budget cuts, poor sales, loss of clients, reorganization, restructuring and/or any other factor that results in employee layoffs have touched every industry.  Many believe that only the private sector has contributed to the jobless numbers but the local governments have contributed to those numbers as well.  IT professionals, consultants, lawyers, and teachers are just a few of those who have been laid off at the private and government sectors. In both sectors, I have friends who have been bequeathed with the henchman-like duty of laying off coworkers.  They have felt guilt at being the one that handed down the bad news and relief that they survived another round of the companies lay offs.  Now they work with one eye on their backs to be on the other end of those job cuts.  As would be expected, the anxiety and panic of hoping to keep their jobs and hustling to send out resumes is taking its toll.

As for my friends who have been laid off, stress does not begin to describe their emotions.  As a contract employee who has had significant employment obstacles this year, I share that stress.  Once abundant contract opportunities have become scarce.  While life has dealt much tougher realities, lay offs can be uniquely daunting when you have a mortgage and kids who rely on your to provide.  So, now what?  What do you do when you have been laid off?  Easy.  You look for another job.  What do you do when jobs are few and far between or you are just one of hundreds or thousands applying for a single position?  What do you do when employers are offering salaries that are significantly less than your skill set previously demanded?  Well, you take it or try your luck and hold out for another opportunity. However, there are many that have not had the fortune of being offered a position. 

Whether you are the designated henchman who now waits for your own ax to fall or a laid off employee, perhaps the time has come for you to reinvent yours.  This, like most things, is easier said than done.  First and foremost, you have to determine your goals, access your skills, and evaluate the means you have to reinvent.  Are you going to go back to school?  Are you going to switch professions?  Do you need to rework your resume?  Are you going to start your own business?  Are you going to downsize your lifestyle and start again?  No matter what you choose make the choice because it is something that you are legitimately interested in and not something that you think you should do.  Success should always include happiness.  This is an opportunity to do some soul searching.  Whatever your situation, try not to internalize and be too critical of yourself.  Sometimes things are what they are.  There will be times when you are on top of the world and other times when the world is on top of you.  Regroup and push forward.  To keep things in perspective, be sure to continue to engage in the things that bring you joy.

Because these are stressful times, please be aware of symptoms of depression.  The symptoms include, but are not limited to, the following...

• Loss of energy
• Loss of pleasure in almost all activities
• Insomnia or Hypersomnia
• Significant loss weight loss or weight gain
• Thoughts of death or suicide
• Feelings of worthlessness or guilt
• Loss of sex drive
• Irritability
• Difficulty Concentrating

On a lighter note... Here is my Fashion Fantasy Look of the Day

Today, in my parallel universe I am a bouncer at a Hollywood Awards Show.

Just a Vent

This has been a crazy and frustrating week for me.  Work has been the pits.  So maybe its because i'm a little irritated, but I've heard the craziest things this week:

• There's a guy that I used to go out with.  He was famous for breaking dates at the last minute which got super frustrating.  I mean the sucker wouldn't even call until the last minute.  So needless to say, I dont really see him anymore. Haven't seen him since August.  We chit-chat on IM sometimes.  So his birthday just passed.  I offered to take him out for a drink.  He says "all I get is a drink."  Ummm yeah dude..that's it.  Was he looking for dinner?  Some goodness?  Why would he expect more?  He can't even show up often enough to achieve jump off status.

• I ordered a pizza.  It came to $13 and some change.  I hand over a $20 bill.  The delivery guy puts it in his pocket and has to stop himself from turning around and says "oh, you want change."  No.  I'd like to give you a $7 tip after being charged a $2 delivery fee.

• I'm waiting on a call about an issue.  The person says, "I have to finish some paperwork and I'm on it!"  It's like 3 days later.  I follow up and they send a message for me to cool it because they are still doing paperwork!  With an exclamation mark!  Should I assume that it's gonna take 3 days.  That's like me saying, I'll call you as soon as I get home and when you call me back after a few days I say, "I said i'd call you when i got home!  Stop bugging me."  But I never told you that when I said that, I was at the airport on my way to Tanzania and I wont be back for a month.

• Two Guys at work are having a conversation:
  Guy 1: I've got to show you the pics from my birthday so that you can see "The humongous bigguns."
  Guy 2: When I meet her, I'm gonna tell her that you said that.
  Guy 1: Go ahead.  I mean that's why she bought em.
  is that really the exact reason...so you could called them humongous bigguns to your friends..wow grown men...

• Then I tried to watch a video earlier that kept stopping and buffering every 5 seconds.  I was ready to smash the computer. 

So obviously I need a chill pill.  So I would personally like to thank The YBF for providing me with my chill pill.  Nothing makes me chill out more than Trey Songz.  Damn I wish that I was a video chick right now! I wasted all of my good body years in college.  I love you Trey.  Call me.
 

 

Product Endorsement of the Week

Ladies,

Does the change of season leave you longing for warmer weather, blue skies and even bluer waters? When was the last time you treated yourself to a nice vacation?

I suggest you save your pesos and check out  The Excellence Luxury Resort Group and in particular their
Playa Mujeres Luxury Resort in Cancun, Mexico.

Here's why:
1. This is an adults only property
2. Its all inclusive
3  Its a beach front resort
4 I'll let the pictures speak for themselves...

You are greeted at the door by a staff member with a refreshing wash cloth and a glass of champagne.

The resort offers a wide variety of drinks, restaurants and activity options.  But don't worry...you can also go there and do absolutely nothing! They provide a daily newsletter that lists the days activities along with the drink,alcoholic vs. non alcoholic, of the day...

There are also plenty of nightime activities including a night club and theater and Mexican themed dinner complete with Mariachi band!



The smallest room they offer....however all of their rooms have an open concept two person shower and jacuzzi tub



One of the many pools with swim up bar



One of the many night time options - X Lounge is a beach option.



Two of the daily drink offerings


A member of the Mariachi band..he had lots of personality and could shake his hind parts with the best of them....

There's always time for an after dinner Cohiba Cuban Cigar and Cognac....try saying that three times fast!

If you want to put on your freak-um dress and let your hair down...dont worry ladies..this resort offers up a night club as well...

Special shout out to the "Hat Sisters" from New England...thanks for the compliment on my dress!

And when you're done for the evening you can sleep outside on the balcony..I wouldn't recommend sleeping outside during the day unless you are really looking to tan!

Blushing ladies...remember its important to treat yourself to a get-a-way for you and your girls or that special significant other in your life.

Miss Jessie's Grow Out Challenge Update: Does Your Significant Other's Opinion Matter?

The Miss Jessie's Grow Out Challenge is right on time.  I have finally fully committed to transitioning my hair from relaxed to natural.  I have long thought about saying farewell to my relaxer, especially after I have decided to live a more organic lifestyle;  however, I never truly committed to the transition until recently.

I have never been celebrated as a patient person.  By nature and design, I am just the opposite, so I am ever the impulsive, impetuous, impatient Aries who becomes bored very easily.  At times, this temperament has been reflected in my hairstyles.  I have had long hair, mid-lenght hair, short hair, very short hair, black hair, reddish hair, blondish hair and everything in between.  Although it has been quite some time since I have experimented with color, my husband has been entertained by my occasional hair impulsion.  He prefers my short hair to the mid-length look I am rolling with now.  

I guess every man has his limits.  When I vocalized my intent to go natural he said little, however, when I told him I was considering the "Big Chop" (BC) so early in the transition process,  I was met with flat out, eye to eye, stong "no".  This actually surprised me.  He said a short crop is one thing but having a "Meshell Ndegeocello" is something all together different. Now, my intent is not to keep my hair that short but instead of waiting months for my relaxed hair to grow out I was considering just cutting off all the relaxed hair.  If I were single, I would not be thinking twice.  The reality is I am a married woman who must consider her husband's feelings.  If he were the kind of man who always had an opinion about my hair, I would take him less seriously.  Since he has so vehemently bulked at this, I feel I must be sensitive to his feelings.  Though I am eager to see what my natural hair will do, I will wait at least until January for more new growth before I get to chopping.

Since having my daughter, I have tried numerous products on her hair in an attempt to find something that complements her textures. Yes, I said textures.  (Much like my sister, my daughter's hair texture varies in the front, middle, and back.)  I know you mom's out there can relate, especially those of you (who, like me) have always gone to the salon and relied on other people to care for your hair and have no particular knowledge of how to care for a child's natural hair.  I have found some hits and misses. Now, that I have committed to the challenge I have been stalking various sites for reviews.  There is a whole world of products out there I knew nothing about.  How exciting!  After watching several youtube demonstrations and reading various and many blogs, I made a dash to Whole Foods and bought the Kinky Curly Curling Custard.  I gave her a bath and a co-wash (cleansed her hair with conditioner only) and applied the Kinky Curly Curling Custard.  When her hair dried, it looked great!!!  I am super and super excited.  The KCCC brought out her natural curl beautifully.  Now she can wear her curly fro without it drying out and looking frizzy.  I can't wait to use this stuff when I transition to my natural hair.

Kinky Curly Curling Custard gets a mega thumbs up from me.  I still want to try the Kinky Curly Come Clean Shampoo, the Knot Today, and the Tiny Twirls.  I'll keep you posted.

A special shout out to the ladies in the Natural Hair chat on Twitter.  Thanks for the great info.  The group meets on Sunday nights at 10pm on Twitter.  Type #naturalhair in the search bar and you are in.

Blushing Ladies Speak:

Have you experienced a similar reaction from your significant other?  How did you handle it?

 

Martha Speaks

I don't know about where you live, but for my area, we seemed to have skipped spring and have been thrust right into summer.  I've been meaning to put away my winter clothes and pop out my spring colors and lighter fabrics.  Spring is definitely one of my favorite seasons.   I also use this time to try to reorganize.   So where do you go for organization and space saving tips.  The queen of organization of course.  Martha Stewart.   Below are some of my favorite tips from her.


Utilizing Extra Space in your Medicine Cabinet



Make the most of a tight space with these easy tricks. Have galvanized metal cut to fit the back of the cabinet and inside the door. Adhere metal with caulk. (If your mirror has clips, loosen them, and slide the metal behind them.) Attach magnetized hooks, a notepad holder for brushes and combs, and spice canisters for hair elastics and barrettes. Group like items in votive holders and small acrylic boxes; double surface space with acrylic risers.

Fashionable Underbed Organizers
Extra sheets, blankets, and towels are at the ready when stored in rolling drawers fitted with distinctive snap-on covers to keep dust at bay.


Drawer How-To
To make drawers, measure the length and width of your bed. Build 4 plywood boxes (or have a carpenter construct them) to fit underneath; allow an inch between boxes and bed legs, and 2 1/2 inches between box tops and bed frame. Paint as desired. Add a 1/2-inch, plate-mounted ball caster to each corner of all boxes: Using a spade bit, drill a hole deep enough to accommodate caster; insert caster, and secure with screws. Attach 2 drawer pulls to front of each box. Cut fabric 1 inch wider than each box on all sides. Turn sides of fabric in 1 inch. Iron, then sew seams in place. Using a hammer and a fabric-to-wood snap kit (available at hardware stores), screw a snap bottom to each drawer corner and to the center of each side. Affix corresponding snap tops to fabric, and secure to boxes.
(A commenter noted that she used old drawers, took the metal tracks off of them, and added casters on the bottom.  Quick and easy.)


A Pull Out Pantry for Shoes?


Normally utilized in kitchens, a pull-out pantry becomes a shoe closet when the shelves are installed at an angle; professional assistance is recommended for this project. Nonskid shelf liners prevent pairs from sliding when the unit moves


Keep Thin Fabrics from falling off of Wood Hangers



Swatches of Ultrasuede fabric, affixed to wooden hangers with a bit of craft glue, provide just enough traction to keep delicate blouses, camisoles, and other hard-to-hang garments from tumbling to the closet floor.


Create Boot Hooks out of cup hooks


Homemade hangers preserve the shape of tall boots and maximize space. They're created by replacing the knobs on cedar boot trees with large cup hooks, which are screwed into the tops. The trees and boots then hang from a café
curtain rod.

Bookends for T-shirts



Tame your T-shirts by folding them into thirds and arranging them folded-end up in the drawer, rather than flat (this is an overhead view). Metal bookends, painted blue and outfitted with rubber surface protectors, hold the shirts upright, letting you see each one.

No Room for Storage in your Bathroom?  No Problem


Just add a bookshelf above your door to add instant storage.  You can find them at your local hardware store, or make one yourself.  It's a great place to keep supplies that may need to be replenished.


Organize that Linen Closet


Prevent folded clothes and linens from toppling with wooden dividers. Choose shelf brackets with the long side measuring just less than the height of your shelf and the short side equal to or less than the depth; place the shorter side of each on the shelf and the longer side against the wall. To secure, drill two wood screws into each bracket from the shelf's underside.

Classy Labels

Keep pantry staples organized with a set of glass storage jars customized with etched lettering. 

1. Clean and dry the glass. Using painter's tape, mark off the area you want to etch. Attach vinyl stick-on letters and decorative tape; press hard to ensure they are attached firmly. 

2. Cover work surfaces (be sure to work in a well-ventilated area). Put on protective gloves and an old shirt with long sleeves. Paint an even layer of etching cream onto glass. Let stand for amount of time indicated by manufacturer's instructions. 

3. Rinse with warm water in a stainless steel sink. (Avoid porcelain sinks; the cream damages glazed surfaces.) Remove letters and tape.